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Hi this is Welcome to Self® and I’m your host, Dr Hayley D Quinn, the anti-burnout business coach. I’m a speaker, author, former clinical psychologist and a late identified auDHDer.
Welcome to Self ® is a podcast for business owners like you who want success but not at the cost of your well-being. This is about transforming self and transforming business. I’ll be here to remind you that you’re human first and as well as being a business owner, you have different roles in your life that need your attention and to manage those well, you need to take care of yourself in the best way possible.
Here you’ll learn about practices that’ll help you navigate not just your business but your non-work life as well and you’ll realise that you’re not alone in the ways you struggle. You’ll have your curiosity piqued on various topics as I chat with wonderful guests and bring you solo bite-sized episodes.
I’m here for service-based business owners and entrepreneurs like you, to help you increase your self-care and compassion, change your relationship with yourself and your business, and elevate your business to a new level so you can live the full and meaningful life you desire.
This is a place of nourishment, growth and helpful information. A place where you can learn ways to assist you and your business to thrive.
We’ll talk all things mindset, strategy and well-being and I’m so excited you’re here. If you haven’t already, go and hit subscribe so you don’t miss an episode.
So, let’s get started
Hi, and welcome back to another season. Season 8 and episode 85. And I have to say I’m really excited about hitting 100 episodes soon. So stick with me for that. We’ll do something to celebrate, not sure what. Welcome back it’s I say this every time. It’s hard to believe that we’re on another season. So season 8 now and this season, I think what I’m going to do is I’m going to be putting some questions to you. So in these short solo episodes, I’m going to give you a question, maybe a couple of questions for you to think about, so that you can start making the changes you need for your business and your life.
I was recently in Orange, in New South Wales for an event called the huddle. Unfortunately it was the last one they’ve run it for 5 years, and that was the 1st one I’d been to, and the last one that I’ll be going to, and it was great. There was over 550 women there, and it was so inspiring not only to listen to the speakers, but also to be in a room with so many amazing women who are running businesses and to listen to what they were saying, to hear pitches about their business, and I got the opportunity to stand up in front of over 550 women and pitch my business as well, which felt really good.
There was some nerves, a little bit of anxiety, but mainly I wanted to stay true to myself in terms of what I want for my business, and that is, to increase my visibility and raise awareness of burnout prevention, and I also gave a little plug for my upcoming book. So whilst I was in orange. I had hit my goal that I’d set myself my word goal of 40,000 words. I hit that goal a week early, and then on the 31st of May I finished the full 1st draft Aka shitty, 1st draft of my book. So I’m really excited about that. What I’m going to do now is, step away from it for a few days, and then come back and start the process of reading through and doing the 1st editsand then work on the process of getting this book published and out into the hands of as many women as I can.
So I’ve got a book waitlist, and I’ll share the link in the show notes. So if you want to be on the wait list for the book, jump on there. I’ll be sharing updates along the way, maybe giving some sneak peeks and maybe even asking for some input. And also, when you’re on that, wait list, there’s going to be an opportunity to become part of my 1st readers. Club. So check out the show notes, click on the link and come and join me on the wait list and join in the excitement and the anticipation of the upcoming book.
One of the things that happened when I was in Orange was I was due to fly to Sydney to see a dear friend and colleague. On Monday night I booked an apartment with a little balcony overlooking the harbour and I didn’t know when I booked it, but Vivid was on. Now this is an event in Sydney, where they light up the Opera House. They light up lots of buildings, and there’s a lot going on. So I was really really looking forward to going and staying in the hotel and having a wander around Sydney Monday night, and then catching up with my friend and colleague on Tuesday, and discussing business ideas, and generally having a lovely catch up. Unfortunately due to the weather in orange, and in Sydney my flight was cancelled, so I rebooked for a 6 Am. Flight, and that was cancelled as well. So there was lots of uncertainty for me, and wondering when will I be able to fly? Will I be able to see my friend? Will I be able to get home in the next couple of days. Now. Ultimately I did get home, but it meant that I missed out on my trip to Sydney for the day, and there was lots of messages about my flight being cancelled or my flight being delayed, and this became quite stressful. Now I’m an autistic woman. I have Adhd sometimes chaos.
I can thrive in. But with things like that it was actually making it really quite hard for me. So I had to really think about what do I need for myself what’s going to be helpful for me to take care of my nervous system and not get too overwhelmed.
So some of the things I did was actually make sure I was reaching out for the help I needed. Now a few years ago that would be much, much harder. But it’s been something I’ve practiced and realised the benefit in asking for help now asking for help isn’t a weakness. It takes a lot of strength and courage.
So the 1st thing I’d ask you to think about is, where do you need help in your life and business?
What are some things you would really benefit from if you allowed yourself to ask somebody else to help you.
So that’s question one.
So I did ask for the help. I had a wonderful woman, Nerida at Orange Airport, who was amazing. She was so helpful, so supportive, and I ultimately had to shift one of my flights from Sydney to Brisbane as well, and she did all that for me, made sure my luggage would go all the way through from Orange to Brisbane, and that I would be able to get my flight. Okay?
And then I managed to get home.
Certainly, miss my friends in Orange, the wonderful activities and events that I was going to. But, gee! It was nice to be home.
Sometimes travelling feels great, and sometimes it can feel difficult.
Or you can just get to a point. I was away for about 10 11 days, so I was ready to be home sleeping in my own bed right?
How good does that feel when you’ve been away, although when I was staying with my friend, I have to say they had a very comfortable bed, and a very, very gorgeous dog for me to play with, so I was very happy there.
With that experience it meant that when I got home I really took a look at my diary that had been a lot for my nervous system. I’d been away for a long time. I’d been lots of different events. I had been around a lot of people which is not the norm for me and then having all the challenges and changes of my flights and getting home. So I looked at my diary and asked myself, what is essential that I do over the next few days, over the next week, and what is something or some things that I can either cancel or reschedule, or do a bit differently. So I did an audit of my calendar and changed what I needed to change.
And again, I know this can feel really difficult. People can get caught up in the guilt, you know. Am I letting people down? Am I going to look flaky? Is this going to cause problems. Am I just leaving more work for myself at a later date? Now, what I’d say to that is in my experience when I’ve reached out to make changes with people more times than not people have responded with, Oh, my gosh! That actually works really well for me, because that means I can go and do ABC,
and even if they don’t, it is okay for you to take care of your own needs. It’s not just okay. It’s essential in terms of just pushing things down the track, and then you’ll have more to do the point there is. You’re going to be doing those things at a time when perhaps you’ve got more energy, you’re feeling more resilient for me. There was no point in trying to push through everything, because that would just lead to me feeling worse for longer.
So my second question to you is what are some things that you could either cancel or reschedule, or do differently for yourself.
So you can take care of your own well-being.
And as you think about this, I want you to notice what shows up. What sort of thoughts or feelings, or bodily sensations start to show up for you.
And can you just be curious about those?
Pay attention to the thoughts, and are they coming from a place of self-criticism.
Are they coming from a place of threat or are they coming from a place of wisdom and self-compassion?
And over this season 8. We’re going to look more at these different questions and how we can navigate these things for ourselves so that we can take care of ourselves really well. because I really do believe if you thrive, your business will, too.
I hear so many women, so many people talk about feeling burnt out, labeling themselves as people pleasers and we want to shift that narrative.
I want you to be thriving. I want you to be enjoying what you’re doing, and I want you to be creating a business that fits in with the life that you want.
So we’re going to leave it short for this 1st episode back. It’s so lovely to be back with you. I’ll have another episode for you next week, and I’ve got some guest episodes. We’ve got a couple of people who they’re already recorded and ready to go. So that’s really exciting. And I look forward to telling you more about who they’ll be soon.
In the meantime, go well and go gently with yourself and check out the show notes. Come and join me on the book. Wait, list.
and I look forward to seeing you again next week. Bye.
Links to Dr Hayley D Quinn Resources
Reclaim Your Time and Energy: 6 Key Boundaries for Women Business Owners
Download here, completely FREE! https://drhayleydquinn.com/resources/
Book now available: https://drhayleydquinn.com/product/book/
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Group Coaching Waitlist: https://drhayleydquinn.myflodesk.com/timetothrivewaitlist
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